


I'm Not Getting Any Younger

by Tonystarkisaslut



Series: Tumblr Prompts [26]
Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017)
Genre: Angst, Dorks in Love, Heavy Angst, M/M, Mention of Past Drug Abuse, Past Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Sadness, both of them are low key suicidal
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-26
Updated: 2019-05-26
Packaged: 2020-03-19 20:24:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 725
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18977719
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tonystarkisaslut/pseuds/Tonystarkisaslut
Summary: For the first post of angst prompts. With 40 up, 46, 24. Starker, Tony is not getting any younger so does his health, Peter and him have been toghether for a long while and Tony feels guilty like Peter is not enjoying his adulthood if he stays with him. Their ages can be ambigous, maybe Peter being on his 30's





	I'm Not Getting Any Younger

**Author's Note:**

> Because this would make Peter 30 in this fic, that makes Tony is 76 years old.  
> I say they've been together for 9 years in this fic.

40-46, “We were heroes.” , “You were my hero.” , “What happened?” , “I/you failed.” , “I tried.” , “It wasn’t enough.” , “It was for me.”

24- “What was I supposed to do?”

* * *

Tony stares out the window, glass of scotch in hand. "We were heroes," He whispers. Well, peter still is a hero, still is Spider-Man. Still a huge part of the New-Age Avengers.

Still young.

And Tony's birthday is tomorrow. He'll be turning 76. 

76 fucking years old.

Tony screams in frustration and throws the glass against the wall. The glass shatters into pieces, and the scotch spills everywhere. Tears prick at Tony's eyes--He feels helpless. He can't defeat age. He can't fight natural causes. He can't evade death forever. 

Peter comes running in, eyes wide. "What happened?" He asks, voice soft. 

Tony sits, putting his head in his hands. "I'm going to die soon," He says into his hands.

Peter sits next to him. "No, you aren't. You exercise, you eat healthy now, you-"

"I drink, I used to do drugs until my thirties, I-"

"There have been countless medical advancements that can-"

"I was stupid in my thirties and forties, I was so sure I was going to die before I got to fifty-"

"You were my hero. You were my hero when you were in your thirties and forties. You saved so many people, you were selfless-"

"What was I supposed to do?! I was going to die without the element I discovered, what was I supposed to do other than kill myself to save others?"

"You could have become a villain, or you could have drank every bottle in the world, or you could have thrown yourself pity parties until you died. But you didn't. You chose to help others, you chose to be a good person, and you chose to be selfless. To be a hero."

Tony sobs and stands again. "I tried to- to save myself. I failed."

"No, Tony. You didn't. You discovered a fucking new element and harvested it, and made a new arc reactor out of it. You saved yourself this many years, nearly forty years-"

"It wasn't enough! I'm still-"

"It was enough for me," Peter whispers, sounding broken. "You gave yourself enough time to meet me. To make me into an Avenger. To give me a life with you."

"Some life!" Tony yells suddenly. "Some life. No kids, because I was too old to have kids when we got together. I'll die before our 10 year anniversary of marriage. Why are you still with me? Why don't you go get a younger girlfriend, someone you can have kids with and grow old with?"

"Because I love you!" Peter yells back. "I love you, not some young girl I can have kids with. I love you, not anyone else. And I don't want to grow old. I don't want to die retired and happy. I want to die sacrificing myself, saving someone else. I can't do that if I have a partner and kids." He cups Tony's face. "I love you. I love you so fucking much, and you're perfect for me. You're my soulmate. You are exactly what I want, exactly what I need. You are absolutely perfect."

Tony sobs and kisses Peter. "Why do you want that?"

"I lost everyone. I lost my parents, my Uncle Ben, my Aunt May. I'll lose you eventually, no matter how I lose you. I don't--I don't want to put that on anyone else. I don't want anyone else to go through the hurt of living while I'm dead. And I don't want to lose anyone else after I lose you. I can't take it anymore." He kisses Tony again. "You're the last person I ever want to lose. The last person I ever love. I am never going to move on from you. I don't want to. I want to die knowing my heart belonged to you and only you."

Tony feels tears cascading down his face now. "I tried. I tried to-"

"Sh, Tony. I know. I would have wanted this even if I didn't date you. I decided this after May died." He kisses Tony again. "And we have 20 years left at least. I'll have lived plenty."

Tony cups his jaw. "I love you, Peter. I'm sorry."

Peter smiles. "I love you too."

**Author's Note:**

> Ah, I really hoped you liked this! This was a hard one for me to write!
> 
>  
> 
> Feel free to send me more prompts!   
> https://tonystarkisaslut.tumblr.com/


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